Over the last couple of days I have heard that three times. I have had two women literally stop and gawk at me open mouthed (these were mums at school, who really ought to know better imo). I have lost count how many times I have been asked when the baby was due, or how much longer I've got to go etc. etc.
I am beginning to think I should make myself a plaquard!
Yes I am pregnant. Yes I am big. Yes I am going to get bigger. DEAL with it!
I am only half joking. I know most folks mean well and everyone always forgets how big pregnant women do get and pregnancy seems to make a woman public property, but really.
As far as I'm concerned the only acceptable thing to ever say to a pregnant woman is. 'What a lovely bump.'
Because every bump, no matter how small, how big, how low, how high is a small miracle of creation. Every pregnancy is different, every bump is different and there is no right or wrong shape. Pregnancy is a lovely time, but it is also exhausting, worrying and at times overwhelming and simply painful.
I have jokingly started calling myself Jemima Puddle Duck, because I waddle. SPD has kicked in with a vengeance and I have to see the funny side of it, or else I cry, because it REALLY hurts. Sitting hurts, standing hurts, walking is sheer agony at times, so the last thing I need right now is comments about my bump.
And really nearly every woman nowadays has scans. I have had four so far, two private ones and two NHS ones, so you can be darn sure there is only one baby in there. And if there were twins in there, what is it to you?
Rant over ;-)
I just wish folks would spare a thought to us pregnant ladies, bar the gawking and exclaiming and oh so witty comments, because they really aren't!
Pregnancy is a wonderful time, but it is also challenging, hormones are going hay wire and feelings get hurt very easily. I have a thick skin and most things bounce off me, but when you're in pain, you have heartburn etc.etc. the last thing you need is silly comments.
A Wow is nice, a smile is lovely. Asking how you are is fine, offering to help with whatever even better. And for pity's sake if you want to touch the bump, ASK!
Right, will really stop ranting now, lol!
On other and very exciting news. My re-write for Scandinavian Scandal is completed at a word count of just under K59, so am pretty pleased with that. What's more the partial is now sitting on my editor's desk *small squeal* and I have started a new WIP, which seems to be going paranormal, which is a first for me. Well, we shall see.
It's all happening in this house, I tell you :-)
I was huge with both of my boys, and it actually sometimes irks me when I see these women with neat bumps and only 4 weeks to go or something.
ReplyDeleteAll I can say is you've got a good placental feed to your baby. (That's what the midwife told me to my first boy weighing 9lb 4oz).
I think every pregnant woman gets these things said to her - you are not alone! People forget how big some women get with carrying a baby, or think the joking is funny, when actually we're a bit sensitive to it all.
I must admit a mum friend (I don't know so well) told me she was pregnant before Christmas. And at the time it was only 8 weeks. (She'd been trying for a very long time as her son is 7 now) and she's so tall and thin, I didn't see a bump for ages... and I was so worried to ask just in case she'd lost it. But as it is, with spring, no longer wearing a winter coat, she has a very neat bump - so phew! I can ask her how she's doing and tell her she looks lovely :D
I do love a good pregnant woman!
You and the bump look gorgeous! :D x
ReplyDeletei always joked my bump with Tom entered the room 5 minutes before the rest of me . but that was me saying it!! therefore acceptable. Anyone else saying it , NOT so.
ReplyDeleteit's a long time since I was pregnant (Sigh) So now I relive it all through you, and my daughter in law. two babies due a day apart. I'll have no nails that week